Wednesday, June 01, 2005

Yet Another Brilliant Column by Mitch in Today's Freep!

How does he do it?! In today's Free Press, Mitch eloquently celebrates the Pistons' triumph at last night's showdown with the Miami Heat. Right from the start, he uses that uniquely Albomian wit to get the ball rolling:

So whom did Rip Hamilton tick off to draw this assignment? As if a bad calf weren't enough, as if running like a hamster in a wheel weren't enough, now he had one more job: Guard Dwyane Wade.
Yuh. And let me build a skyscraper in my spare time. <LOL!-ed.>Let me move some furniture during halftime . Let me drive the team bus. Let me get the morning coffee and doughnuts. Guard Wade? Doesn't that fall under a two-man job?

As if this marvelous opening isn't enough, Mitch displays his "hip factor", referencing -- get this -- DEVO! What will he think of next?!

And, to paraphrase Devo: Whippet, Good

Oh, Mitch! There truly isn't a thing that this man can't make brilliant. He only rarely does non-sports related columns; I wish he wrote the whole damn paper! Or at least school the other journalists at the Free Press in his unique--perfect--stylings.


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